Amateurs

If there's one thing I know about in this world, it's drinking. I've been accused of being a jack of all trades, master of none. In other words, I know a little bit about a lot of things, but I'm not an expert in anything. However, there are a few exceptions.

The social aspects of drinking alcohol is one of them. Drinking for me has been, and always will be, a social thing. I don't sit here at my computer with a beer in my hand. If I'm drinking, I'm out doing something; I'm at a restaurant or bar, at a picnic, at an event (sporting or concert), etc.

The 4th of July is no exception. I had to work in the morning/early afternoon on the 4th this year. No biggie, I was done by 3pm. The neighbors up the street had been planning a block party. Being somewhat of a rural guy, I'd never really been to a "real" block party, so I was kind of excited. Not to mention the fact that the block they live on has an unobstructed view of the Red Rock Casino and their annual fireworks display.

Unfortunately, the 4th of July falls into the category of one of many amateur drinking dates. Or, what my buddy Davey calls "amateur nights."

To explain, amateur night is when all the "normal" people drink (Davey is a hardcore alcoholic). But as a seasoned social drinker, I can relate too. Amateur nights include all major holidays, Christmas, Thanksgiving, the 4th, etc, and especially the "drinking" holidays such as New Years Eve, St Patrick's Day and Cinco de Mayo.

Amateur nights are the times when those that don't drink very often come out of the suburbs and abuse alcohol, the law, their bodies and their surroundings. They can't handle it. They're fish out of water. It usually leads to things like fights, DUI's, puking and general social misconduct.

Also, most participants of amateur nights really don't think things through. For example, they don't think about what they're gonna feel like the next day. My neighbors are no exceptions.

Although, the 3rd of July isn't really considered an amateur night, it was part of the amateur weekend that just occurred. So, these amateur neighbors of mine decided to get hammered drunk the night before the 4th, on Friday, the 3rd. Bad decision. This is a perfect example of a huge amateur mistake, especially with big plans for the next day. They didn't think things through.

They were all sick and miserable the next day, not just any other day, but the 4th of fucking July, the day they had planned for months for their big block party. Well, needless to say, in typical amateur fashion, they bailed on the party. The party didn't happen because they're idiots. Yes, I was a little pissed as I could have done a number of different things that night. But the prospect of not having to drive or take a cab somewhere was very appealing, especially on an amateur night.
Arghhh!!

However, it still kind of happened, as they had tons and tons of food. So, the one guy, the original organizer, decided to just BBQ in his backyard, as opposed to out front on the street. Because I was committed, I wandered over there.

It was really uncomfortable because everyone was tired and in a bad mood. Hungover parents yelling at their kids and dogs...not a good scene. Besides the fact that it felt like a private party despite the entire neighborhood being invited over a month ago. The thing of it was, they really, desperately wanted to cancel the whole thing, but knew they technically couldn't, so they moved it to the backyard and made everyone not in their immediate family uncomfortable. Completely. Fucking. Lame.

I did manage to salvage the evening somewhat. Of course, I didn't stick around at the backyard BBQ. I felt and saw what was going on, so I stuck around long enough to act like I wanted to be there (because I was in fact, invited, and wanted to remind them of that), and then promptly left. On the way home, I bumped into another neighbor that was, ironically, involved in the festivities the night before, hence somewhat responsible for the 4th of July debacle. But he's a little more mature and he and I decided to make a mellow night of it. Which turned out to be quite pleasant, as he has a huge screen TV, kick ass sound system and is into live music as much as I am. So, we vegged on the green furniture while watching live concert footage of David Gilmore and Jeff Beck. It was cool.

But the other folks...typical amateurs.